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  • Writer's pictureSandhya Gokal

This is me trying

Another Taylor Swift tribute post. God I love that woman. Her songs are so universal and relatable!

They told me all of my cages were mental

So I got wasted like all my potential

Let’s get straight into it.

Trying to be a healthy eater is hard.

Mostly because we all have voices in our heads telling us something that holds us back

“I’m not good enough”

“I’m a failure”

“I’ve already tried that and it didn’t work”

“Why should I bother? I’m unlovable”

Mental cages are the hardest to break free from. You need the strongest weapons and shields to climb out. 

But your brain’s supposed to protect you right?

Yeah it is.

The problem is that your brain IS protecting you.

If you are struggling to become a healthy eater because of your mental cages….

It could be that your brain needs an update. 

So today’s game is: Update your brain.

Brain update #1 - Identify what your brain truly thinks you want

When you were a kid and fell down, did your parents give you chocolate and lollies to make you feel better?

If they did, your brain message might sound like this:

"I’m unhappy, I'm hurting, so I need chocolate and lollies to make me feel better."

If, when you went through a breakup at 21, you turned to noodles and grilled cheese sandwiches because they were easy, comforting foods, your brain might have interpreted it differently:

“Something bad has happened in my life. I need to eat easy foods that taste good and I’ll be able to function.”

Now, those moments in time that created that message will have gone by and be tiny dots on your life journey.

But those messages remain behind, impressions left by pivotal events through the sands of time. 

Can you see how fighting against those mental barriers can be both fruitless and exhausting?

Reading through your brain inbox is the first step to changing your healthy eating journey.

Brain update #2: Create new messaging

Once you’ve identified the old messages that need to be deleted, it’s time to retrain your wild dragon brain that’s been breathing fire on all your progress, and tame it so that it meekly allows you to do what you want to do.

Write down the beliefs you want your brain to have. 

Write them in present tense and make them as specific as possible. 

For example:

"I eat to nourish my body so that I have energy to run around with my kids."

"I include an extra vegetable in each meal"

"I put into my body things that I know will give it the strength and vitality to function optimally."

You can choose ANY belief you want, but make sure it is something you want, not what you don’t want. 

Remember that the brain cannot distinguish between “I want” and “I don’t want”. It will focus on what you tell it. So it’s important to tell it things you actually want.

Brain update #3: Change the conversation

Remember those thoughts you have?

“I’m not good enough”

“I’m a failure”

“I’ve already tried that and it didn’t work”

“Why should I bother? I’m unlovable”

I have a question for you.

If a friend came to you and was having those thoughts, or said those words to you, how would you respond?

I can pretty much guarantee that you would say something filled with empathy, compassion and love. 

This next brain update focuses on treating yourself as if you were your best friend. 

The next time you find yourself in a negative self-talk cycle, mentally yell STOP, as loudly as you can. Kindly but firmly redirect the conversation! 

Some of the directions the conversation can go are:

"What are the things I did well today?"

"How did I make progress today?" 

"Even if it’s the tiniest thing, where did I experience a win?"

"What about my body am I grateful for?"

"What made me smile today?"

These pattern breaking thoughts are excellent conversation starters to promoting a better relationship with yourself. 

Try it for a while. You might just find yourself with a new best friend!

Phew, that’s a lot of updates! Let’s park them there for a while and wait for them to take effect. 

And it's hard to be at a party when I feel like an open wound

It’s a well known fact that you are the sum of the five people you are closest to.

But it’s a lesser known fact that those five people are ever shifting entities. And when you are working to change your identity, the very foundation of what makes you, YOU, sometimes being around people can be the hardest thing ever, because they are constant reminders of what you used to be.

The fact is that when you are trying to create change in your life, being around people can be the thing that holds you back. 

Now, I’m not saying go hibernate in a cave and meet a bear as your only friend.

The point I’m trying to make is to be careful of how your energy is being spent. Is it being spent keeping your shields up around the people who are trying to keep you the same? Or are you gathering energy from people who are working to lift you to where you want to go, through support, accountability or even walking the journey with you?

If you feel like rebuilding yourself is exposing a different, vulnerable side of yourself, protect yourself with the proper shields. 

I just wanted you to know, That this is me trying, At least I'm trying

At the end of the day, the first step on any journey is the defining one, because it takes you off the life trajectory you were travelling, and moves you closer to the person you want to be. I applaud your efforts! Trying your hardest is the most you can do. You’re a champion, because at least you’re trying.

If you want to know more about building up the proper shields and accessing weapons to overcome the mental monsters you face, book a 30 minute discovery call with me and we can chat about what you need on your healthy eating journey!

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